even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Randomize
