I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
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