I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
