I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
