1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize
