This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
