Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
