Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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