Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
