he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Randomize
