No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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