The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
