I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
