her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize
