my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Randomize
