So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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