it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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