So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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