Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
this is an emotional support booty call
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize