SEEEEXXX PLEASE
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
