Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
