I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
