If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
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