They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
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