I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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