Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
only you would photoshop your dick
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize
