If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
