I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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