So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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