Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
