just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Randomize
