He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
