Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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