We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
