I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
How does one acquire holy water?
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Randomize
