I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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