Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
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