I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
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