i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
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