I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
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