We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Randomize