OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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