Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
