Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
there is puke in my bra ... again
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize