Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Randomize
