Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
