you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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