One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I thought I drunk dialed Adam last night and left him a voicemail. I just checked my phone. I realize I left a drunk voicemail with my son's teacher.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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