even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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