i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
