glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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