Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
i need some magic done to my vagina
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
